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Murderous magician will find out what his Wandsworth

One of Harold’s most beguiling mysteries has finally been solved, and sadly proven to be a most despicable and gruesome crime. Every local knew and loved the spectacular magic show put on annually by...

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Bible Society ‘largely ignorant’ of Harry Potter stories

Some Christians ‘entirely ignorant’ of what’s in his wand. Children and parents have warned of ‘widespread ignorance’ of Potter lore amongst the members of the Bible Society. A small number of the...

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Cliff finally comes out of the closet

Cliff chose the popular IKEA ‘Syndrome’ wardrobe, which is made in Stockholm. Harold’s very own magician and illusionist Cliff Platt has finally emerged from his latest David Blaine-style feat of...

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Putin ‘over the moon’ with talent show win

Gobsmacked. “I was gobsmacked when they told me I won,” said magician Vladimir Putin. “It hasn’t fully sunk in yet, I’m speechless.” The shock result was announced just hours after voting closed. “He...

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